Sean C. Capparuccia

The Weight of Doubt

3rd Sunday in Lent

Exodus 17:1–7; Psalm 73; Romans 5:1–1; John 4:3–41

“With Thy grace anoint [our] eyes, Make [us] to salvation wise,

Wisdom from above impart, Give [us] the believing heart”[1] 

We are now into the third week of Lent; almost half-way to Easter. And just to recap for you what we’ve done so far:

Beginning our Lenten journey with ashes on our forehead, reminding us, not only of our mortality – for we are but dust and to dust we shall return – but also of our depravity, we have been trekking through the wilderness. We saw the weight of temptation, a tool that Satan uses to tempt and test. Then we looked at the weight of silence and the importance of regularly confessing our sins before God to, hopefully, mitigate the weight of temptations. Today we will look at what I will call the weight of doubt, which is not always a bad thing, in fact, sometimes it is a very good thing, but it is something we need to handle carefully. So, I hope you are beginning to see this thread running through our Lenten series, that as we wait for the Easter Resurrection, we are experiencing the weight of these things that are all a part of our Christian life.

Doubt is a fairly broad concept, isn’t it? But at it’s root, it is the antithesis of truth. I was listening to the Glen Beck program this past Friday and he was sharing some thoughts on “truth” and he said something that struck me. He said, “When we get to the place where we say, ‘I know,’ we stop searching for the truth.” Let me repeat that: “When we get to the place where we say, ‘I know,’ we stop searching for the truth.” In his particular context he was talking about our political situation where we’ve got all these things going on around us – war in Iran, terrorists, crazy people shooting everyone else up, various politicians defrauding the tax-payers, lying under oath – all these things going on. And then you’ve got commentators making definite assertions on the matter: “I know that Israel is behind the terrorist bombings,” or “I know that Senator so-and-so was involved with that embezzling.” It goes on and on. Then we find out some weeks later that what that commentator knew turned out to be false. I think I can safely say, I know that most everybody is fed up with what these people think they know.

To ‘know’ something, should be the result of having the truth. We know beyond the shadow of doubt. I know the sun will rise tomorrow at 7:31 A.M., and not just because I Googled it, but because it is backed up by centuries, if not millennia, of math and science and observation. If humans know one thing at all, we at least know with certainty what time the sun will rise and set.

But we also live in an age of extreme doubt. It seems hardly anything can truly be believed anymore. Think about this for a minute…

     Gen-Z, defined as that group of people who were born between 1997 and 2012, were completely raised in this age of doubt.

     Millennials, those born from 1981 to 1996, were young, but at least had gotten through most of their childhood.

     Generation X, currently 45-60 years old saw some crazy stuff growing up, but they at least, for the most part, know a hawk form a handsaw.

     And the Baby Boomers, those over 60, are looking around wondering why everyone is in La-La Land.

But there’s an interesting trend happening now: Gen-Z, the ones who were taught that boys could be girls and girls could be boys because gender is all just a human construct anyway (which by the way is a direct attack on God’s creation) is now the generation that is finding its way back to church. Now you can find a million articles on this by people way smarter than me and who have more time to write articles, but here’s what I think: at some point, this God-made spirit within us must search for Truth. Think about it, almost all this generation has ever known has been fairy-tales, half-truths, and lies. And they are now searching for what is true and real.

Doubt is a quiet struggle, though, isn’t it? I mean, you don’t go around saying, I doubt God is really there. Or, I doubt God really listens to us. Or, I doubt God will provide what we need at this time. Sometimes we may think it, but we rarely say it, and so we often face our doubts alone, searching for truth in the things around us.

In a sense, when we doubt, it almost feels as though our faith is drying up like a pool in a desert, it slowly begins to evaporate until it’s just a small puddle.

Israel in Exodus

In our Old Testament lesson, the people of Israel were getting mighty thirsty for there was no water to drink. They had been delivered from Egypt but now, with their physical thirst, doubt was creeping in. They were asking themselves, “Is God among us or not?” Because it sure doesn’t seem like it! And they quarreled with Moses accusing him (and Moses’ God) of dragging them out into the desert just to see them die of thirst. So, God, in order to show not only His power and might but His mercy, told Moses to take his staff and strike a certain rock near Mt. Horeb. Now Mt. Horeb was the exact place where God initially met Moses in the burning bush, so Moses knew this place well. “Strike the rock and water will come out of it.”

In his first letter to the Corinthians, Paul was talking about this story and told them, “The rock was Christ.” How merciful Christ is, that He would give to drink even to those who were evil in His sight. But He allowed all to drink in the wilderness that all may see His wondrous deeds. Even so, God met Israel in their doubt and saved them.

I’m sure we can all look back over our lives and see where God has delivered us. From a sickness, from a bad situation, from a potential car wreck even. Close calls, bad falls, and brick walls – God has saved us from them all. And yet, we still doubt.

Jesus at the Well

In Matthew’s Gospel, Jesus meets a Samaritan woman at Jacob’s well. She has come to the well in the heat of the day because she is too ashamed to come in the morning with all the other women. She is an outcast. She is, in today’s language, one of the “marginalized.” She has learned to keep to herself because she is the object of endless gossip and scorn. Her whole life is one of doubt. She’s been married five times and she’s now living with her boyfriend, so she doubts love. All of her neighbors and peers treat her with contempt, so she doubts friendship. Now she comes to the well to get water and this man there tells her about something called living water so she’s doubting his sanity. Then He tells her that she, as a Samaritan, “worships what she does not know.” In other words, her religion is useless. So, she’s doubting the very core of what she believes.

We have all grown up in a time when it is considered taboo to knock another person’s religion. We’re Christians, but so what if our neighbor is a Muslim, or the guy we work with is a Buddhist, or your sister-in-law’s brother is a Mormon. I think we’ve all been taught “to each his own.” Even within Christendom we’re told that we all believe the same thing, that the differences are small and don’t matter much. And when we engage with some people, we may begin to doubt what we believe a bit. Some people begin to doubt a lot. Maybe these people are right. Maybe Jesus was just a good man, and we can become gods like he did. I assure you, He was not, and you cannot.  

Like Jesus said to the woman, “You worship what you do not know.”  I think this can apply to the non-Christian religions. Do not believe for a second that what a non-Christian believes is acceptable to God. It isn’t.

Within Christendom, it is a matter of serious Bible study. We look at what our brothers and sisters in Christ believe and study it and see what Scripture says. We also look to the traditions of the Church in history, and we look at reason, and we look, too, at our experience. Of course, all of these are second to Scripture which is God’s inspired Word, but they all play a part. But the point is, when we have doubts, we must go to God’s Word and study it. Ask for the Holy Spirit to lead us to God’s Truth on a particular subject. But I digress…

This woman must have been full of doubt. But she was also at a place to seek Truth. She didn’t respond to Jesus with, “I’m right and you’re wrong.” She realized that His words were words of life. Only the Holy Spirit can cause that understanding. Like all of us, she was spiritually dead until Jesus met her and gave her life. That life was the living water; the Holy Spirit is the living water that Jesus was talking about. A couple chapters over in John 7, Jesus says, “If anyone is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink. He who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, ‘From his innermost being shall flow rivers of living water’” (7:37-38), and of, course, Jesus was speaking of the coming Holy Spirit.

   We should all take note of Jesus’ tactic in dealing with this woman. He doesn’t just blurt out the Truth all at once. He could’ve said from the outset, “Hey, lady, I’m the Messiah, believe in Me and you’ll be saved.” That’s not a very good tactic. No, He makes statements that cause her to ask questions, and questions make people think. When you tell people they just need Jesus they tend to say, “Yeah, whatever, man. If that works for you….” Unless there is some sense of doubt, there is no need to search for truth. Jesus was the Master at getting people to search for truth.

But don’t confuse the doubt of unbelief with the doubt of a believer in Christ. An unbeliever doubts God’s truth as a whole. A believer may doubt God’s truth as it applies to them. This is where, if you are a true believer in Christ, that we need to go a little deeper into the well.

Looking now into our passage from Romans, let us see first and foremost the beginning of our salvation. We are justified by faith. “Justified,” as I’ve said before, is being declared righteous. Declared righteous, not made righteous. And this faith which justifies us is a gift of God.  Here is where we differ with the Catholic Church: they say that Justification is the result of faith plus works. In other words, we have faith in Christ, we do certain works, and because of that God says, “Now I am satisfied. I justify you.” Until you do a bad work, then you’re unjustified until you do the good work again.

We believe that Faith results in being justified plus good works. It seems like a slight difference, but it is actually a big difference. Let me state that again: our being justified which necessarily causes us to do good works is the result of our Faith in Christ. And even here, it is not Faith that saves us, but Christ who saves us, by uniting us to Him in faith. Some people have gotten into the habit of saying “works don’t matter,” which isn’t entirely true. They don’t matter before being justified, but they do on the other side of justification, as James said, a Christian faith without works is not a real faith.

This is important to Romans because here Paul says, “[You, now] having been justified by faith, have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.” By God’s gift of faith to you, you have been justified, and are now, though you were a sinner who doubted God’s truth, are now reconciled to God through union with Jesus Christ and because of His sacrifice.  But wait, there’s more…. Because of this faith, you can “exult in the hope of the glory of God.’ In regards to salvation, no one can truly boast about how great they are or the things they’ve done, but, Paul tells us, we can certainly boast about the greatness of our Savior Jesus Christ. He has brought the dead to life, and you and I are proof of it!

We can even exult in our sufferings. When we suffer because of the Gospel, we can glory in God because when we suffer, He shows His power. In our weaknesses, He shows His strength. If you’ve ever read that free magazine Voice of the Martyrs about Christians all over the world who suffer for being Christians you are amazed at the stories. You wonder, how can anyone possibly get through ordeals like that? Some of the stories are horrific. But they – and we – can get through things like that because God gives His people strength.

Because of Christ, we know that our “suffering produces perseverance; perseverance produces good and godly character; and godly character produces hope. And this hope does not disappoint, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us” (Rom. 5: 4-5).  From faith – to hope – to love.

Our world culture is all about love. Love one another; be kind to one another. Don’t be a bully. Don’t be racist. Don’t be sexist. Don’t be a homophobe, Islamophobe, Xenophobe… just don’t be Phobe period.  But they want us to get to love without faith and hope in Christ. Without faith and hope in Christ the best anyone can be is just nice. To truly love, which is, by the way, to be perfect as God is perfect, can only come by Christ and by the Holy Spirit Who is given to those who are given faith.

            And for those who still may have some doubts, Paul drives it home when he says, “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this, that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us.”  God does not wait for you to get all your ducks in a row; He doesn’t sit back nervously biting His nails hoping you’ll make that right decision and come to Him. While we were still sinners – or rather, while we were still ignoring Him and not caring less about God and the Bible and church and all those dumb things – He died for us. Then He gave you faith. You didn’t ask for it – there isn’t a person among you who can honestly say, “I just decided one day I wanted to have faith, so I says, God, give me some of that.” What you did do was respond to the faith He gave you by saying, “Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.”

            So, the big question here this morning is, why do we doubt? God, in Christ Jesus, has done all this for us, for all those who believe and for all those who have yet to believe, and yet we still doubt that He will get us through this wilderness. His grace is infinitely greater than our doubt.   

            Beloved, He has already brought you back from the dead and He didn’t raise you from the dead to watch you thirst to death. He is only saying, “I am the living water. Come to Me and drink.”

            So, the next time you feel that silent killer called doubt creep into your soul, go to His Word and think about what He has already done, and search diligently for the answer. There at the well of His revealed wisdom, He will meet you. We can confidently say, even now with the woman who was at the well 2000 years ago, that we now worship what we do know, Jesus Christ, and we worship in and by the Holy Spirit, and in Truth. ~Amen   

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[1] Charles Wesley, The Unpublished Poetry of Charles Wesley: Hymns and Poems for Church and World, vol 3, “Before Reading the Scripture” stanza 2 (Nashville:Kingswood Books, 1992), 172.